Finding My Voice

I have spent most of this weekend on stage. I received a call late last week asking me to play a part for a short one act drama. I haven’t been on stage in a while, I must admit, it felt wonderful. I played the part of a loud out-spoken and ultimately embarrassing individual who caused a little too much trouble at a stuffy meeting of religious zealots. Just like real life.
I had a lot of fun playing the part, especially because it hits so close to home right now. I have been in a very dry season of spiritual doubt and fear. At first I tried to patch the hole that I felt in my belief system, but, I soon realized that I needed a complete over-haul. I had to strip down all my thoughts, beliefs, convictions to a simple set of truths that I simply could not escape. I thought it would be easy. It hasn’t been. I didn’t realize how infected my soul had become by the viral nature of religiosity.
This weekend sealed the deal a bit. I am starting the re-building process now. I realize that I know a lot less about God than I thought. I’m okay with that. If I could figure out God, then where do I stand? I also am beginning to realize how much damage I have done to the truth that Jesus came to give us. I spent a lot more of my life trying to figure out how Jesus applied to my life than actually being like Jesus and helping out, befriending people, healing the sick, giving to the poor, caring for the needy, loving the unlovable. Jesus had a lot of things to say to the religious leaders of his day. If the leader of the church today are listening, what is Jesus really saying today?

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